1. Tried to record Lost last night on my TiVo, but it didn't record. So now I'm an episode out.
2. Went to join video store, but forgot proof of ID. And the bugger's half an hours walk away.
3. There's a key on my keyring that I don't recognise. Don't want to throw it away, though, cos I might need it.
4. I can't eat dairy, but I really love fudge.
5. Chris told me the end of Sixth Sense even though I bought it. I just hadn't got round to watching it.
6. Got a paper cut on that bit between my thumb and finger.
7. Don't have anything to do when toast is cooking. It's a wasted two minutes.
8. Dunno what to get mum for her birthday.
9. The beef mince I bought yesterday had already passed its use by date. What a waste of three bucks.
10. I can't remember the name of the guy who played Charles in 'Charles in Charge'. I think he was in 'Happy Days' too. It might be Tom Bosley.
11. I've got a splinter. I don't know where the tweezers are.
12. Left the iron on last night. That'll cost me.
13.Someone's parked in my space again. Don't people in this place understand that each parking space is allocated?
14. I heard a song in a shop the other day that I really liked but the shop assistant couldn't tell me what the track was called.
15. The battery on my iPod keeps running out even though the display says that it's full.
16. Just saw the 'Father Dowling Mysteries' on TV. Tom Bosley was in it. He isn't Charles in Charge after all.
17. Beyonce wants me to rap on another one of her damn songs. Maybe I could say that my record company won't allow it or something.
18. Suntan lotion is really sticky and horrible - but I'm gonna be out in the sun all day so I HAVE to wear it.
19. There was a fella on the coach eating hot food even though there was a sign that blatantly said "no hot food allowed". It annoyed me, but I didn't like to say anything.
20. I can never guess how much rice to put in the pan.
21. There are people dying every day in Africa - and yet people still throw food away.
22. The car's started doing that clicking thing again. I thought the guy said he'd fixed it.
23. The car tax is due next month, and I can't remember where the MOT form is.
24. I went to the shop at five to nine, it wasn't open but I could see the bloke inside. He could have opened it if he wanted to.
25. I wanted to play my Bon Jovi Greatest Hits CD but it wasn't in the case. It could be anywhere.
26. I've got a direct debit coming out of my account and I don't know what it is. I think its a magazine subscription, but I don't which one.
27. Is it spelt "Poppodoms" or "Pappadoms"? I'm never sure.
28. Mum wants her foot-pump back. I can't for the life of me remember where it is.
29. I didn't really get Mulholland Drive. Chris said it was good, but I got very confused. What a waste of four bucks.
30. The apartment upstairs had another party last night. It kept me up till 11.45. If it happens again, I definitely intend to mention it to them.
31. I forgot to empty the kitchen trash can last night. Everything smells of bananas now.
32. There are so many different faiths in the world - but which one is right? They can't all be.
33. Chris laughed at me because I thought a tiger was a female lion.
34. I heard today that there's two new kinds of hi tech DVDs coming out soon. Great. My movie collection is obselete again.
35. I can't think of a rhyme for 'motherfuckers'. So that's that rap out of the window.
36. Is there a country in the world that doesn't have dogs in it?
37. Beyonce ordered some olives for us to snack on last night. I ate one, but spat it out into my hanky when she wasn't looking.
38. Chris laughed at me again because I used the word 'pacific' instead of the word 'specific'. I might get one of those 'Word of the day' calendars.
39. For a minute I thought I had found a rhyme. 'Other truckers'. But I couldn't find a context to make it fit in the rap.
40. The mall only stocks 80 watt bulbs but the one that blew in the hallway was a 60 watt. Will an 80 watt one work?
41. I can't remember if I put a stamp on my IRS letter this morning. I probably did though.
42. I've started getting loads of junk email about stocks. I don't even buy stocks.
43. I've lost my Rotring ball-point pen again. I'm sure it was next to the fridge. Damn. It's got a real smooth action.
44. My golden syrup is way past it's use-by date. But syrup can't go off can it? It still looks fine.
45. Is every single tomato different? They all look pretty much the same to me.
46. If everyone touches taps before they wash their hands, doesn't that mean your hands just get dirty again when you turn them off?
47. So is milk good for you or not? I'm confused now.
48. My laptops running really slow. I mean really slow. I just hope it's not a virus or something.
49. I got a hundred dollar bill from the ATM. Who's gonna change a hundred dollar bill?
50. Beyonce bought some honeydew melon for us to eat at breakfast. I spat it out into my hanky when she wasn't looking.
51. How do big ships stay afloat? They're made of metal, so surely they should sink?
52. I keep forgetting that I should take ice cream out of the freezer about 10 minutes before I want to eat it. That way its much softer.
53. I suddenly started thinking about the way I walk. It totally put me off my walking and I think I started to walk funny. I can't remember how I used to walk now.
54. The guy at the grocery store short-changed me by ten bucks. I realised straight away but didn't want to make a scene. That ten bucks could have bought me a DVD.
55. Shit! I just realised I haven't got a pension. I'll start paying into one as soon as I can.
56. Chris has noticed that my walk has changed. He laughed at me. I wish I could remember what it used to be like. I think it was a bit more swaggery.
57. I don't know if 'swaggery' is a real word or not.
58. I borrowed 'Spy Kids 2' from Chris. It sucked cos it was just this lame movie about these kids who were spies. I should have stuck to my instincts and borrowed 'Agent Cody Banks' instead.
59. Beyonce thinks I should eat more seeds. Seeds taste of shit.
I'M NOT FINISHED...